Hey, it’s PA here. (PA = Punkin Aston, it’s my new pen name) Guess what? I no longer need to hack into my Mom Ava’s computer. She knows I am much more entertaining than she is. So when she went to bed tonight and “accidentally” left her Macbook turned on, I think she knew I would go ahead and write her blog for her. Do you think this is a WGA (Writers Guild) rules violation? Oh yah, the big unions haven’t muscled in and unionized the bloggers yet. I think the WGA must think most bloggers are stay at home mom’s who sit around in their pajamas and listen to old Alanis Morissette CD’s all day. And then all of those Alanis songs get them so pissed off that they all blog because they need to vent their frustration. I may just be a dog, but I know that’s not true at all. Because every time I blog I get emails from all sorts of very nice people, both boys and girls. They are everything from super nice young mom’s to doctors, to lawyers and even a fireman named Dave — and they are all very kind to me.
It seems to me that most of the boys who read Mom’s blog seem to like it more when she is writing the blogs and not me Punkin. Note to those guys– Don’t let that blonde hair fool you. Consider yourself lucky you don’t have to live with her. Just remember what she did to all of us dogs earlier this week:
I won’t tell you what our Mom Ava is for Halloween today, but she didn’t need to dress up, all she needed was a broom to make her costume complete… I’m just sayin’
Well as you know, today is infact Halloween and crazy Mom dressed me as a Bunny Princess. Oh, and just as I had predicted on my Tuesday’s blog, my doggie Mom has eaten all of the candy, except 3 little pieces. That means when I split them up with the other dogs, I will only get 2 pieces; BoBo, Itty Bitty and Pookie will all have to share 1 piece. (I love being the #1 dog)
So ok, I am not really sure why Ava works out or runs every day. Because from what I see, everytime she comes in from a run the first thing she says is “I’m hungry.” Then she mumbles some crap about low sugar blood or blood sugar and says she needs some chocolate to restore her chemical imbalance. I’ll tell you what’s imbalanced are the brains of the people who believe her when she claims how healthy she eats.
Listen folks, when she’s feeding me cottage cheese and lumpy dry cereal on the floor, she’s over in the corner wolfing down designer chocolates and drinking Dunkin’s coffee. There’s something wrong with that picture. Does anyone know the number for the ASPCA? I’m just sayin’.
I am so happy you all like me. Even though I am just a canine I feel so accepted. Did you hear my last blog was featured by some really cool girl named Patty who writes a newsletter and sends it out on Twitter. Check it out here is the link . That’s really cool….and I don’t even know what Twitter is, I think it must be another stupid time consuming addictive human habit. So anyways, Yes, I was on Twitter. I don’t see Ava getting any fancy write ups when she’s blogging.
I think I will call Ava’s manager Mr. Bricks and ask if he will also represent me now that I’m a big time writer. I know I will be a much easier client than my Mommy is to him. Between you and me, sometimes I think she is too hard on Mr. Bricks. He seems like a real nice guy, it’s not his fault he is addicted to the McRib.
And that whole wandering eye thing that Mom wrote about Mr. Bricks, well truth be told his eyes are so beady, I never really noticed it. I think he’s a nice guy and just because he sweats a lot ( I mean like a river sometimes) I won’t make fun of him like my mom Ava does. She’s mean I tell you.
Well…I’ve got a few squirrels I need to go chase.
Love and Fishes —
PA aka Punkin
My Mommie’s website www.avaaston.com