On the fourth Thursday in the month of November we celebrate Thanksgiving Day in the United States. It has been a day of over eating since 1621 when some yahoo in Plymouth, Massachusetts invited the neighbors over to celebrate a bountiful harvest without first telling the wife.
You should have seen the muckery when she found out she was having all of the neighbors and a bunch of Wampanoag Indians over for dinner. She was pissed…. Oh I wasn’t there, but my manager Mr. Bricks was. I think it must have been where he learned the art of over eating. Actually, I wouldn’t be surprised if Mr. Bricks goes to McDonald’s tomorrow and orders Turkey McNuggets and a cranberry shake!
Yes, the original concept behind the holiday was to celebrate a bountiful harvest. However nowhere in the history books did this Greek girl ever read that the pilgrims ate and ate until they puked or popped the buckles off of their pants. They didn’t over eat and neither should you. If you do end up eating so much on Thanksgiving day that you have to unzip or unbutton your pants just to breath, then let me tell you that is just wrong on so many levels!
First off, no one wants to peek at someone elses underpants after just eating. Especially if it is one of your older relatives who sometimes forget to wear any underpants at all. — OK, that thought just made me vomit a little in the back of my throat – I am so sorry for the visual. Secondly, over eating is just plain unhealthy. You do not need one slice of every type of pie.
I am wondering why on Thanksgiving Day some families also feel the need to serve a potato fixed 10 different ways? It is Thanksgiving Day — not National Idaho Spud day! These potato happy families have mashed potatoes, boiled potatoes, scalloped potatoes, scalloped potatoes with cheese, baked sweet potatoes, sweet potato pie, garlic mashed potatoes, and on and on with the spuds. I know the potato is a super food, but when you have 10 different types of potato dishes on your plate for one meal, a potato goes from being a super food to a big butt. Don’t believe me? Check out Mr. Bricks’ rear end next time you see him — oh dang, I did it again, I gave another revolting visual. My Bad.
TURKEY TRIVIA: There was a very short time in our country’s history when Benjamin Franklin was lobbying to have the turkey as our national bird! His good buddy, Thomas Jefferson thought it was a fowl idea and fought Franklin hard on it. As rumor has it, the male turkey is called a “Tom” turkey by Mr. Franklin as a snide reference to Mr. Jefferson’s turkey rebuff.
So tomorrow as you enjoy Thanksgiving dinner with your family and friends just be thankful your Greek blonde friend Ava was able to remind you not to over eat so you can keep your pants zipped up. You will be thankful for that. We all will.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
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