My Alleregies Are So Bad I Was In A Coma

This has been one of the worst allergy seasons for many people across the country. This Greek girl included.  I am unsure how long it is going to last, but according to this map today is going to be another day of sneezing, scratching my eye balls out and hacking up a lung. Oh, joy I can not wait.

According to the dude on the TV who gets paid a lot of money to be wrong at least 50% of the time when he predicts the weather, this year’s seasonal allergies were going to be really bad because there was so much rain and snow and that means there will be a higher than normal pollen count. (There are a thousand factory workers at the Kleenex factory jumping up and down with this new added job security) I am not sure if that was a scientific observation from him or if he just happened to see 5 people in front of him at the Piggly Wiggly buying Benadryl and tissues.

One of my fans sent me an email and said that their sinuses were so bad that they were in a coma this winter. A coma? For reals? That would suck. Maybe I should be thankful I am able to get relief by drilling holes into my nostrils with a cordless drill and wearing the silly sticky things across my nose at night and not in a pollen induced coma.

Why do I think this picture of me will be in next week’s National Enquier with the headline,  “Ava Aston On Allergy Death Bed.” And then they would run a bogus story about how I had to give away 3 of my four dogs because they were toxic to me. Nope, I’m not allergic to my fur-babies – just allergic to pollen and the National Enquier – just sayin’.

Wanna know the real sad thing about my allergies? Ok, I eat extremely healthy, drink a ton of water (or Vitamin Water Zero), I  work out 1 -2 hours a day and often run up to 5 miles a day….yet some silly tree pollen can have me down for the count and bed ridden when my manager Mr. Bricks goes about his life drinking Diet Coke like it is holy water and eating McDonalds McRibs like they are the holy sacrament and yet he is not affected at all by this or any other allergy season.

The real trick is to add a whole lot of spicy food and even onions to your diet, because adding these foods to your diet brings relief.  Wait  a second, the McRib has spicy barbecue sauce and onions…. Maybe I should….no, forget it, I will continue on with my inability to breath and sleeping with a sticky thing across my nose before I ever bite into a McRib. That is just too gross.

I was also surprised to find out that during allergy season many doctors recommend from not drinking milk or eating dairy products. They said that milk and dairy products increase mucus production in people even if they do not have a milk allergy. I guess, without getting really gross, the dairy makes the mucus thicker creating a perfect environment for bacteria and allergens to thrive.

So put down that milk shake and string cheese and things will get better. Aren’t you glad you read my blog today?


Dr. Ava


PS: I’m not really a doctor but I will play one on TV or in a movie of someone hires me to.

About Ava Aston's Muckery

Hello! Thanks for stopping by. My name is Ava Aston and I am a recording artist and actress. I'm just an ordinary girl who acts, sings, writes songs and now writes this blog. I hope you enjoy my blogging enough to want to subscribe. Blessings, Ava If you want to learn even more about me, check out my website at
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16 Responses to My Alleregies Are So Bad I Was In A Coma

  1. chenpeng says:

    What a poor girl~i’m allergic to pollen too.So try me, i do understand the pain, sometimes i just can’t breath with my nose in the night, it’s really a nightmare ,almost the whole month, i couldn’t focus my mind, i’m dizzy, and always thirsty and what a waste of Kleenex. If i’m allergic to food,i can avoid it of not eating.But you know, the cute pollen, flying everywhere, the mask, not working, the medicine, not working, the only thing i can do is to buy more paper towel and hope time goes faster and faster.Once a docter suggest me that injection maybe work.It’s a longtime therapy.Please attention for two details 1.longtime;2.maybe work.According to the so-called docter, injection was 4 times a week, and it would last 2 years.So the initial feeling of me was that the nerdy guy was definitely hilarious.His treatment sounded more like a tattoo with a lot of patience. So i decided to accept the fact that being dizzy every year,in the special season.”May pollen be with you~”But on the bright side, i got a chance to pure my spirit every allergy season.Nothing gonna too important when you can breath freely, i can see what i really need in my life, just like a master.
    Be different from you , my pollen allergy season is July and August, so i’m still clear-headed by now.
    By the way, the pollen map is pretty cool, i have never seen this kind of stuff before in my country.

    • Chenpeng; First off thanks for subscribing to my blog. I hope you enjoy it!

      Yes, these allergies suck. I am not sure I ever though of pollen and allergies in places like China, but I guess they would have it too. And I agree, doctors can be crazy.



      • chenpeng says:

        People in China do not got pollen allergy very often.So i’m really lucky enough to enjoy it as a Chinese.But i know pollen allergy is common in Japanese.And the mask made in Japan is so tough and looks cool,you know ,like a Ninja.

      • Thanks for the explanation..I always see the Japanese wearing those cool masks.



  2. mindslam says:

    Sorry to hear that they are getting to you. I’m one of those lucky ones that have never had problems with allergies. I sure know lot of people that do. Would be tough for me to cut out milk too…LOL

  3. Kaddie says:

    That sucks >.< I get allergies a lot too most of the year so I can sypathize.

  4. The Hook says:

    I’m always glad I read your blog! Hang in there!

  5. tiallarising says:

    yes, I’m very glad I read your blog today – Dr. Ava. 😉 I hope you get better soon!


  6. tiallarising says:

    oh and BTW – even though those sticky nose strips are the weirdest things, they are miracle workers. 😀


  7. I.M. Pangs says:

    That’s a bummer. Hope it gets better soon.

    I feel for ya. The constant rain lately is triggering migraines. Considering a nogginectomy. I don’t use it that much anyway.

  8. gillianloves says:

    Have you thought about getting tested to see what pollens are worst? Then you can get injections to desensitise yourself. It takes a while to kick in but might be worth a shot (or fifty shots but hey, whose counting?)

    : )

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