Okay – I am done being polite, “I WANT A RECORD DEAL“!!! Now, I know it’s not much of a secret that the Greek Girl wants a record deal. I also know some of my loyal blog readers may be just a tad sick of hearing me say so. Sorry, sometimes it’s off with the filter and full Greek ahead. As well, there are some of you who may think I already have one and will be surprised to hear I actually “don’t“. I know – shocking right?!? Not really. For some reason or another lightning just hasn’t struck yet.
You may be thinking to yourself, “How bad do you really want it?” Well let’s just put it like this. You can take all the coffee, chocolate, sneakers and Kohl’s cash in the world and add them up and you still won’t come up with how much I want a record deal. For that matter you can set me up with a lifelong workout with Jillian Michaels, Bob Harper or even the master himself my workout hero, Tony Horton (the creator of p90x) and I would still say “NO” if it meant that OR a record deal. I think the only thing I would let come between me and a record deal would be my doggies, but it would be a heck of a battle.
So in hopes to figure out just what is wrong with me and why no-one is offering me that contract, I have come up with what I feel are the top 10 reasons why I don’t have one yet:
1. I don’t know or nor am related to a Kardashian, a Hilton, a Trump or any other famous person. Nor am I married to or friends with one. So there goes that idea.
2. Even though everyone says to me, “You should get on that American Idol”. What they don’t realize is that it’s a show designed to highlight singers with a sad story who “need” to grow in their abilities. Not to mention oh only about 1,000,000 people audition each season and only 20 can make it. So it’s like winning the lottery. Besides I don’t have a fluorescent purple mohawk, haven’t been to jail or rehab. I guess I’m just too normal.
3. That brings me to number 3 – I am too old for American Idol so there in itself lies a huge issue. For some reason there is the horrible assumption I must not be a viable artist with actual talent because I don’t wear a training bra (except when I’m working out of course – jk). Yeah, believe it or not the industry is age discriminatory toward a woman who would otherwise be considered “new” to the scene and over the age of 22. If I had a penny for every time I have talked with someone about my music the second or third question is always, “How old are you anyway?” – Like all of a sudden I won’t be a good singer anymore if I am over 22? For reals.
4. I don’t go on stage in my underpants. Yup that’s right. You will never be able to see me gracing the cover of any magazine in less than what you already have seen on my Facebook page. So Hugh Hefner can just hold his call cuz I am not posing – ah-hem Lindsay Lohan. Just sayin’
5. I don’t believe in selling my soul, it doesn’t lend itself to what I consider a good exit strategy. Something about the whole “sold my soul to the devil” thing just doesn’t quite sound like a good idea to me. Just sayin’.
6. Because my marketing and online presence is good, some have said as good as some artists who “actually” are on a record label, a lot of people have the wrong idea about me. So they just assume I am sitting in my McMansion counting my downloads and off on a world tour and therefore don’t think Ms. Aston needs anyone to help her out. Eeeehhh wrong answer.
7. Since I do have my morals and am not out boozing it up and being what would be considered a “bad role model” and therefore won’t be selling enough US or People magazines or be on the next episode of TMZ, I guess I just don’t have what it takes to be signed to a record deal. What? You mean you don’t like going out partying and clubbing it up Ava? – no you won’t see any pictures of me yapping it up at a strip club (can anyone say Rihanna?) he hemmmm Nope not here, not the Greek Girl. That’s not how I roll. ;D
8. Hmmmm… I don’t know anyone in the music industry. Hard to get to the gate keepers, many of whom will toss your stuff in the trash. Meanwhile they hook their college roommates girlfriends brother up instead. This kinda makes it really hard to actually get my music through to someone who “matters”.
9. This brings me to not having enough dough. Unfortunately for some, money no matter how much of it you have can not buy “talent”. See there is such a thing out there called, “buying a deal” it happens all the time. If you have the money you can quite literally buy a record deal. Although I do have a good presence online there is no way I can compete with an artist on a label. It takes a ton of moola to get music out there enough to make a dent. So there is no way I can compete with labels that have sky high marketing budgets. You know, it’s the same reason why you see and hear a song that you hate and it plays over and over and over…. The powers that be are putting it there and keeping it there, and on the magazine covers, and talk shows, with agents, publicists, yada yada yada. Leaving little room for indie artists like me to get into the game.
10. It boils down to this. As much as you my fans love me, on the grand scale
No-one knows who I am, kinda like a needle in a haystack. My manager Mr. Bricks used to say I was like finding a classic 1960’s corvette with only 100 miles on it. It’s that simple ~ the powers that be just haven’t heard of me yet. So I have to keep putting it out there in hopes that someday, some way someone will soon stumble upon the Greek Girl and think, “hey she’s got talent, she’s marketable and pretty funny too.” then they will want to sign me.
So until then, I am just going to keep plugging away. It all comes down to this thing I call the “know, dough, show“. In other words it comes down to who you know, how much dough ($$) you got or what show you can get on. Looks like I just gotta keep plugging away.
Hey Mr. Record Label man – “what about me?”
Blessings, Love & Music –
Ava xo 🙂