Well I was just about to write this weeks blog about the things I most would like to see happen in 2014. Then I happened to be watching the news and heard that Saturday was the seventh annual “Good Riddance Day” in NYC. Yeah you read it right, I was thinking the same thing, it is not a joke. For real, people actually gathered in NYC’s Times Square to say goodbye to bad memories from 2013. They even dumped actual memories into a giant shredder to destroy them once and for all.
I gotta say, I wish I knew where this shredder were all these years and that this “day” actually existed cuz this Greek Girl has a few memories of her own she wishes she could put in the hopper and say “Sayonara” too. Yeah, believe it or not, even I have things I wish I could erase from my brain. So, in honor of this day I decided to make a hybrid blog. Instead of just listing the Top-10 things I wish I could erase from my memories from 2013 I will be including a replacement option for 2014 to go along with those unwanted memories.
10. Boston Marathon Bombing.
2014 Replacement: How about – no bombing, anywhere.
9. Twerking, Wrecking Ball and well pretty much anything Miley Cyrus.
2014 Replacement: Congressional ban on Twerking and Miley Cyrus joins Bieber in retirement, wouldn’t complain if Lady Gaga joined them as well.
8. GLAAD’s crying foul over the Duck Dynasty “Tolerance” issue.
2014 Replacement: GLAAD is disbanded and embraces the fact that there are more Christians than they think, and the Word of God is more powerful than anything they can cry about.
7. Kim Kardashian and her selfies. Do we really want to see her butt again in 2014?
2014 Replacement: People stop taking “Duck Lip” selfies, they are stupid. No more selfies in the mirror where you can see the camera you are holding up. No more celebrity nudie selfies – period.
6. Wolf of Wall Street. My eyeballs are still burning and it’s been almost a week since I saw that debacle of a half-rated porno.
2014 Replacement: How about a little Saving Mr. Banks and Mary Poppins for good measure to cleanse my noggin. Or better yet, how about bringing back the NC-17 rating since Hollywood is a bit too obsessed with graphic nudity these days. (We actually don’t “need” to see everything to get the point) Just sayin’.
5. The time I took a bite out of that Twinkie and allowed myself to be caught on camera while doing so. No I didn’t have three of them either as my husband would like the rest of the world to think.
2014 Replacement: Low-fat Oreos. Hey, if I am gonna splurge on sweets it should be good. That Twinkie tasted like cardboard.
4. Beyonce’s Superbowl Halftime Show. My eyeballs are still burning from that too.
2014 Replacement: Definitely not Bieber, Miley or Gaga. I would rather have Barney or Mickey Mouse do it. No matter what for the love of God, please let it be a real band or somebody who can actually sing. On key preferably, and who doesn’t need the words to the Anthem written on their hand.
3. The Obama Inauguration. I am still in denial that he actually won… again. Ask me, it was rigged.
2014 Replacement: We dig up Reagan. In my world we would have Rush Limbaugh as President and Mark Levin as the VP. Don’t like it? Too bad, it’s my Top-10 list so GLAAD can kiss it.
2. The millionth season of American Idol. Seriously… how many more sad sappy stories do we need from mediocre singers? Do we really need another “Idols Tour? Good gravy.
2014 Replacement: How about record labels actually doing their job and finding actual talent. There’s plenty of it out there, just not all of it has orange hair, crack addicted parents, or missing a limb.
1. The disastrous Obamacare implementation and rollout.
2014 Replacement: Obama Impeachment. Need I say more?
So there you have it. As we move into the new year of 2014, I pray and hope for good things to come.
Blessings, Love & Music ~